I'd just had two days to pull myself back together and now I was headed down the familiar street toward my home. I glanced over at the Phil McGraw therapy book lying on the passenger seat, hoping that his words could help me to "get real" with this new situation. As I reached to push up the turn signal, a surge of panic swept through my body. I was heading for the one place on earth that sent shivers through my spine. It was sad to think that my own home represented a place of such discomfort to me. I remembered back to a time when I decorated my home and carefully selected the items that would make it feel like a castle to my family and friends. Everyone's home should feel like a heaven on earth. My home was the furthest thing from heaven that I could think of. It didn't feel like home anymore, and it definitely didn't represent the calm and comfortable feelings that I had hoped for in previous years.

At one time I had felt that I was an emotionally strong person. I couldn't believe what the past six years had done to my soul. I couldn't believe that I had become desperate enough to place my own daughter in a mental health institution.

As I pulled into the driveway and reached for the button to open the garage door, a new panic swept over me. Lanny was waiting inside. Normally he would have been at work, but he had taken the day off so we could have some time to discuss the extremely difficult situation that we had become so involved in.